Sunday, February 24, 2008

WHERE?

Received from Sherrylee:



Q: Where can women over the age of 60 find younger, sexy men who are
interested in them?
A: Try a bookstore under fiction.


Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?
A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement.
When you are done you will have a place to live.

Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your 60+ year old husband?
A: Tell him you're pregnant.

Q: How can you avoid spotting wrinkles every time you walk by a mirror?
A: Take off your glasses.

Q: Why should 60+ year old people use valet parking?
A: Maybe you won’t notice it when they wreck your car!


Q: Is it common for 60+ year olds to have problems with short term
memory storage?
A: Storing memory is not a problem, retrieving it is the problem.

Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.

Q: Where should 60+ year olds look for eye glasses?
A: On their foreheads.

Q: What is the most common remark made by 60+ year olds when they
enter antique stores?
A: "Gosh, I remember these."



Betty from BealcAs Pad

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3 Bullets

There once was a man who had nothing for his family to eat. He had an old rifle and three bullets.

So, he decided that he would go out hunting and kill some wild game for dinner.

As he went down the road, he saw a rabbit. He shot at the rabbit and missed it. The rabbit ran away.

Then he saw a squirrel and fired a shot at the squirrel, but missed it. The squirrel disappeared into a hole in a cottonwood treel.

As he went further, he saw a large, wild "Tom" turkey in the tree, but he had only one bullet remaining.

A voice spoke to him and said, "Pray first, aim high, and stay focused."

However, at the same time he saw a deer which was a better kill.

He brought the gun down and aimed at the deer. But, then he saw a rattlesnake between his legs, about to bite him, so he naturally brought the gun down further to shoot the rattlesnake.

Still, the voice said again to him, "I said, 'Pray, Aim high, and Stay focused."

So, the man decided to listen to God's voice.

He prayed, then aimed the gun high up in the tree, and shot the wild turkey.

The bullet bounced off the turkey and killed the deer.

The handle fell off the gun, hit the snake in the head, and killed it. And, when the gun had gone off, it knocked him into a pond.

When he stood up to look around, he had fish in all his pockets, a dead deer, and a turkey for his family to eat.

The snake, (Satan), was dead simply because the man listened to God.

Moral of the story:
Pray first before you do anything, aim and shoot high in your goals, and stay focused on God.

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~ HE IS THE LIGHT OF THE WORLD ~

Jesus, is our life, our Hope and Our Lord and Savior.
In Him do I trust. W/O Him I am lost and wondering around on this globe of existence without any life in me. W/Him, there is life, with Him there is Hope, with Him there is a place for me in heaven one day.

JESUS IS OUR LIGHT

JESUS IS OUR LIGHT
He shed those tears 4 U & I

JESUS IS THE ANSWER

"Our only Hope of Heaven".
He is the bright and morning star, the lily of the valley
our redeemer and forever friend.